My partner insisted I ask you all to “tuna in” to the Utah Jazz’s upcoming game against the Oklahoma City Thunder. I confess, I’m baffled by her request and what a tuna could possibly signify in basketball (no pun intended), but now we’re both burdened by the knowledge of this truly awful maritime pun.
May this article be a judgment upon us both.
If you, dear reader, possess the mental resilience to endure such a cringeworthy wordplay, perhaps you’ll also bravely face the Utah Jazz’s (21-57, 14th in West) looming battle against the formidable NBA-best Oklahoma City Thunder (61-16, 1st in West) with similar composure. Your strength is remarkable; it will require an iron will to process the vast chasm between basketball’s top team (OKC) and one of its struggling counterparts (Utah).
Allow me to direct your attention to Brice Sensabaugh, who has been averaging nearly 20 points over his last 30 games in the absence of Utah’s seasoned players. Or perhaps Ace Bailey, the Jazz rookie who has silenced rumors of unhappiness in the Beehive State, blossoming into one of his class’s most promising young talents? And what about Cody Williams — who is not terrible — the player once dismissed as a ‘lost cause’ who has notched 20 or more points in seven of his last 10 games leading up to the Oklahoma City matchup?
Just a season ago, the Utah Jazz appeared adrift and lacking direction. However, with another year of growth and development, Utah’s young roster now ranks among basketball’s most promising. With a healthy Markkanen, JJJ, Kessler, and George leading the way, they could evolve into one of the deepest and most formidable teams by 2026 (and a little help from the lottery gods with AJ Dybantsa or Darryn Peterson wouldn’t hurt, but I’m not fussy).
Yes, OKC is basketball’s equivalent of a relentless force, dismantling nearly every team they encounter, and indeed, they are widely expected to lift the NBA Finals trophy for a second consecutive season. Undeniably, they will likely dispatch the visiting Jazz with ease, much like a sniffing dog blowing powdered sugar off a donut. Yet, something significant is brewing in Utah. Do not interpret the outcome of this upcoming game as the definitive measure of these teams’ long-term potential.
Will Hardy and his courageous band of “Boy Scouts” began an expedition back in October, a journey now spanning 78 games that has depleted the strength of the troop’s most veteran members. Now, as “Troop 801” approaches the Paycom Center, home to the formidable Oklahoma City Thunder, they face a tempest of epic proportions. This storm has forced the young scouts into makeshift shelter, shivering in fear as lightning rips through the sky, followed by the booming voice of Shai Gilgeous-Alexander.
Rain accumulated, forming puddles that grew into ponds, then lakes. The remaining scouts clung to floating debris, much like Leonardo DiCaprio in Titanic. Those who heeded parental age restrictions and missed James Cameron’s nautical epic were swallowed by the storm, but the Thunder’s fury was met by the defiant boys who comprehend what it means to “paint me like one of your French girls.” Is that irony? It’s inconsequential. The waters are rising, and the Thunder’s advance is relentless.
Then, suddenly, something shot from beneath the surface like a fountain, leaping skyward. For a fleeting moment, the storm seemed to… hesitate? A hint of vulnerability? A brief glimpse of hope for the young and spirited Jazz? The shape became clear, revealing its head, tail, and… *is that a tuna?* Perhaps defeating the Thunder isn’t an impossible feat after all — perhaps the undermanned Jazz truly have a fighting chance. With a mighty *sploosh*, the brave newcomer returned to its depths, having ignited a spark of hope in the fumbling hearts of these scouts.
[Did I push the tuna theme too far? I suspect I might have.]
Calvin Barrett is a writer, editor, and avid Mario Kart enthusiast residing in Tokyo, Japan. He has been covering the NBA and College Sports since 2024.